Thursday, February 14, 2008

Oh, What the Hell...Another Valentines Post

The image you see to your left will surely no longer be happening. Since Clemens decided to bring misremembered-back and throw not just his partner in bromance Pettitte under the bus, but also his fucking wife! Whoah.
I hope he went all out like Kobe and Roidger got Debbie some sick fucking rock or else she might not allow him to pump her full of his rocket fuel tonight.
Here is a quick rundown of some of my favorite quotes from the Clemens/McNamee bitch fight that happened yesterday as compiled by Yahoo!:
"Mr. Clemens bled through his designer pants."
"Mr. Clemens, do you recall any bleeding through your pants in 2001?"
"Those little band-aids for his butt, if it bled."
"Mr. Clemens, according to your account, Mr. McNamee injected your wife in your bedroom without your knowledge."
"That said there was a palpable mass on the right buttock of Mr. Clemens. On another record, it also noticed a similar mass on the left buttock.”
"That was a hurried instance when we were in the closet."
"Just for the record, there was an injury to Mr. Clemens' buttocks."
"This is a new definition of lynching," Rep. Tom Davis says.
Yeesh, what's more embarassing for Clemens? The sleazy jokes that can be made about his wife or all the talk about his lumpy and infected butt? Here are a couple more:
“Have you ever been a vegetarian?”
“Have you ever been a vegan?”
(Clemens replied he didn't know what that was. Uh oh! PeTA's got itself a new celebrity target to exploit for press!)
And finally, my favorite, which just proves this was all a suck off/grandstanding waste of motherfucking time...Representative William Lacy Clay passed on this softball question he said came from Representative Michael Capuano of Massachusetts. He "wants to know what uniform you're going to wear to the Hall of Fame?"
Your tax dollars at work!
UPDATE! How did I miss this?:
"Roger showed up after golf, I believe. Maybe he was golfing. I don't know if he was golfing. He might have showed up a little bit later, but no, he was there the whole time for the most part. He was in the house. I could tell a specific story about him being there, which was involving Jose (Canseco), Jose's wife and Roger's wife when they went inside, when the guys showed up. I mean, they talked -- no disrespect, but they talked about how great Jose's wife's augmentation job was to Debbie and showed her. And then Debbie showed her her augmentation job."

No comments: