Rivers Cuomo Thinks You Care

Look, I dig Weezer (at least the first three albums. After that Cuomo just figured people would dig whatever shit he put out in faux-awkward geek format. But he forgot, HE'S A FUCKING ROCK STAR. No one is gonna pity you when you're making money hand over fist and getting gash thrown at you like it's candy from a pinata). I haven't checked out his new disc of demos and b-sides yet but plan to sometime. Seriously, the stack of shit I'm trying to listen to now would kill Grrr if she was sleeping under it.
Cuomo passed himself off as the Brian Wilson of my generation minus the genius (just listen to Pet Sounds) and now believes the legion of now 20 something hipsters care about the intense poetry and depth that went into writing "Buddy Holly", "Undone (The Sweater Song)", and "In the Garage" (quite possibly the most ballsy rip off of Brian Wilson since "Kokomo"). Yes, Pinkerton is one of the best albums of the 90's but that doesn't absolve Cuomo from being called out for his pretentious bullshit.
Now, the motherfucker is planning on an EIGHT VOLUME (at press time) memoir about his life past and present. If you've ever heard a Weezer song written without the keen pop sense of Matt Sharpe (read: everything post Pinkerton) you know this is a bad idea. Cuomo is a megalomaniac who will allow no one to restrain his sensitive artistic nature. Yeah, the same dude who got rich writing three minute pop tunes is writing EIGHT VOLUMES about his life. Weak.
Let me sum it up for you guys: I was a loner, I was a geek, I got famous because of Kurt Cobain, I did a bunch of coke and professed my love of young Asian chicks, I married one, I don't want to be famous anymore. THE END.
Powerfull stuff, there, Rivers!